Shame and Guilt in Recovery
Shame and guilt are two of the most common feelings in early recovery. They're different, they hit different, and there are concrete ways to work through both without letting them drag you back.
What's the Difference Between Shame and Guilt?
Shame says "I am bad." Guilt says "I did bad things."
Shame is about identity. Guilt is about actions. Both are painful.
Why Do Shame and Guilt Show Up in Recovery?
Recovery strips away the numbing. That means feelings come flooding back.
- Remembering past behavior
- Harm caused to others
- Stigma from society
- Recovery allows feeling
How Do You Work Through Shame and Guilt?
1. Acknowledge feelings.
Don't suppress. Feel them.
2. Make amends.
Where possible. Take action.
3. Learn from the past.
What did you learn?
4. Forgive yourself.
You're human. You changed.
5. Focus on now.
What are you doing today?
When Should You Get Help?
Get help if shame or guilt:
- Keeps you from recovery
- Causes depression
- Leads to relapse
- Feels unbearable
A therapist who understands addiction, a sponsor, or a recovery peer group like AA or SMART Recovery can help you process what you're carrying.
What Should You Do First?
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Acknowledge. Feel it.
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Make amends. Where possible.
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Learn. What did you learn?
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Forgive. Yourself.
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Now. Focus on today.
You are not your worst moments.
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